Recovering from a divorce can be a hard thing for just about anyone to go through. Add having the rewarding, yet tough, job of being a parent into the mix and the divorce just got a lot harder. When you are a parent, you really do not have a lot of room in your life for major errors. Therefore, you will want to make sure that you are doing just about everything you can to avoid big issues.
Struggling With Depression
It is not uncommon to go through a period of time where you suffer from some depression during the middle of and shortly after the finalization of your divorce. In order to work through your emotions in a healthy manner, you will need to hang out with some friends, spend time with loved ones, and get some professional counseling if you need to. What you do not want to do is to take risks with drugs as a way to cope with what you are going through. Should you already find yourself in the midst of fighting a problem with substance abuse, you will want to look for an outpatient drug treatment facility that can assist you.
Trouble With Finances
This is one of those pitfalls that many people find themselves dealing with right after they go through a divorce. This usually happens when there is an immediate and drastic change in the amount of income that is coming into the home versus the amount of bills that have to be paid every month. Financial trouble can also arise when you are dealing with depression and find yourself spending money on things that should not be purchased, such as drinks out or a whole new wardrobe in an attempt to make yourself feel better. The last thing you want to do is to end up with a shopping addiction because you were attempting to heal a wound with shopping.
Bringing The Children Into Adult Problems
No matter who did or said what or who initiated the divorce, it is vital that you and your ex-spouse do everything you can in order refrain from bad mouthing the other parent. In fact, you want to try your best to make sure that they are not even noticing you crying over the breakup. Children have a funny way of thinking that they must be at fault for divorces and that is the last thing you want your children to think. However, you will want to continue to encourage your children to express their feelings about the entire situation, as that is healthy. Remember, no matter how much you are hurting, your children are hurting worse. It is your job to be there for their moral support, not the other way around.
When you go from having two parents in the home to having one, things can get a little hectic. Make sure that you are taking advantage of the times when the kids are visiting with the other parent so you can take some personal time for yourself. You need to get plenty of rest – not just for the physical benefits, but for your emotional health as well. If you need a little additional assistance with this in the beginning, you might want to ask friends or family to come over so you can have some respite.
It is going to take some time to get into a good routine for yourself that is healthy and that leads you to a more fulfilling life for you and the children, but you will get there. You just have to hang on, keep pushing through, and do your best to recognize the pitfalls that happen to many newly divorced parents so you can avoid them.